I am a 80′s baby and 90′s kid. I grew up with Nickelodeon, MTV and of course hip hop. I can remember the first time I heard Kwame and the next day I had to have everything polka-dotted. I don’t know what it’s like to not have music videos. That also means that I have grown up looking at sexual images in hip hop videos all my life. There is no denying that the culture of hip hop is now American culture. From clothing to animals, hip hop is a lifestyle.

In the black community sex is not a subject that is brought up in detail. The big “sex talk” for most of my friends and myself went like this:

YOU HAVE SEX I’LL KILL YOU

YOU GET PREGNANT I’LL KILL YOU

YOU GET SOMEONE PREGNANT THEY CAN’T LIVE HERE! 

Sounds very informative right? Where do you go to learn what sex and love  is about? For my generation we turned to rap and hip hop culture. What I learned from rap songs and videos have led so many astray and turned a whole generation into some sex backwards assholes, including myself. Here are a few of the myths and BS.

1. It Ain’t No Fun If The Homies Can’t Have None-  I have nothing against a threesome. I do like the more the merrier outlook. Yet when Snoop made this song he wasn’t saying it to be a good thing. Running a “train” on a girl, a girl having multiple sexual partners during one sexual session, doesn’t serve her much pleasure. The guys don’t show her any respect afterwards. During my high school days this a was goal for many of my male friends. find a girl and get her to sleep with all your friends then call her names such as a hoe and slut. Sex without respect is useless.
2. Bitches Ain’t Shit But Hoes And Tricks- Again with the name calling. The debate about what a “bitch” is has been going on and on till the break of dawn. It’s no secret that hip hop is a man’s world. But with women half of their music wouldn’t sell since we buy more music than men. This mantra has spilled over into everyday life. Most women have encountered a man who knew nothing about her calling her a bitch for not accepting his advances. Is hip hop to blame? Not fully but it doesn’t help either.
3. The Bigger The Ass The Better The Sex-  Black men love ass. Black men make majority of rap music. See the pattern! First came Buffie The Body, then Cocoa, Then Lola Love, and its been ass on ass on ass ever since. Women are noticing that in hip hop culture the girl with the ass get’s the guy so they are getting butt injections (some are getting killed from illegal injections). A woman’s ass size does not make her more sexually experienced. Where this notion came from is beyond me.
4. I Fuck Them ,But I Love You- In “Song Cry” by Jay Z he says “I was just fucking them girls I was gone get right back”. Cheating is well-known in the hip hop community. When you have large amounts of money of course you will have large amounts of women chasing the money and men attached to it. What is wrong with this statement is that it has women setting with being number 1 instead of being the only one. Shows like “Love and Hip Hop” reveal how wives or girlfriends of famous men stick around even when they are being disrespected and cheated on. What happens is that non-famous men feel that they are at liberty to mimic this same behavior and she is supposed to stay with him because that’s what a “down ass chick” is supposed to do. WRONG! If you can’t keep your penis to yourself then yes she has a right to leave you and find someone who will honor her with monogamy. Love is not measured by how much pain I can take.

 Over the last decade Hip Hop has been trying to clean up it’s act by promoting safe sex initivies and positive shows like “Run’s House” give Hip Hop more family values. My hope is that the next generation of hip hop heads get a better education on love and sex instead of learning from a 2 Live Crew album.